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Update:  It has been 11 days of my 1950s/modern day housewife transformation adventure. I set my alarm for 4:45am each day to get up before the kids. My plan is to get 1 chore done while my coffee brews. Then enjoy a cup of coffee watching the news without a single moooommmmyyy. After my delicious coffee I will make a healthy breakfast for the boys and get ready for the day. Well…that’s the plan.

January 1-4 my alarm went off and I promptly turned that sucker off! Who in the right mind gets up at 4:45am!

January 5th magic happened and I got up. I felt much more together when the kids woke up so I had a new vigor and have managed to get up bright and early everyday.

Guess what?? I have brushed my hair everyday this week! I have had proper clothes on by 6:30am. And I have had a good healthy meal ready for dinner each night. FIST PUMP (do people say this anymore??)

Now on to my dog story.

My dog is out to sabotage my housewife journey! Here are the top five things my dog does to make my chore life harder than it has to be!

  1. Sweeping – I have to sweep my floors everyday because I have dogs that I let in my house (I can’t help it they are just so darn cute!)

    The cute culprit

    As I do my daily activities in the house or on the farm Shaggy follows my every movement. When I sweep I make a pile like everyone does (unless I am doing it wrong! possible advice needed) Every time without fail he gives a stretch with a yawn and lies right in the middle of my pile.

  2. Vacuuming – When I pull out the vacuum I see terror and joy in my pups eyes. While I vacuum he attacks the vacuum with leaps, bounds and growls. I can’t tell if this is his favorite chore or his least favorite chore. It makes it hard to quickly vacuum with him trying to eat my vacuum all the time.
  3. Making the bed – Shaggy insists his chin needs to be resting somewhere on the bed while I make it. His head is usually on the blanket I am trying to flip into place. If he is feeling really naughty he sees this as the perfect opportunity to jump on the bed.
  4. Kitchen Chores – Washing dishes and cooking meals have become a dangerous activity. Because he is under foot all the time he is a major tripping hazard! I have to slow down so I don’t break my neck.
  5. Washing the floor – I constantly have to tell Shags to get out of my way while I move around to floor with my cloth. I wash my floors on my hands and knees because I hate the mop. Dog hair sticks to my mop and I can’t get it off and when I wash the floor dog hair gets everywhere. It is super frustrating. So cloth in hand works better for me. When my floor is sparkling clean is usually the time when Shaggy decides to bring me a present. One time he brought me to hugest rat I have ever seen! He dropped it on my sparkling floor and sat nice looking at me. I know in his head he was thinking look momma this is for you, aren’t I a good boy! I was thinking holy cow get that outta here! Other days when I floor is sparkling somebody lets the dogs in and they are covered in mud from head to toe. By the time my hysterical screams and snapping have pushed the dogs back outside my floor is covered in muddy prints. So back to the cloth and bucket I go.

Not to mention I will never pee or shower alone again! Dogs and kids are similar that way!